A Weight Has Been Lifted

While I wait, I've been trying to immerse myself in any and all things Russian. So, when I noticed that an agency I've been looking into was holding a cultural event, I decided to go. They were hosting a Russian Folk Musical Group. Yea, road trip!

My mom came with me. I am sooooo lucky she is very supportive. I think having such a supportive family makes all the difference! It was great to be able to spend some quality time with my mom. Life is hectic and for the whole drive there and back we talked and talked. It was a decent drive except on the way back, it must have been skunk night!! Ugh!! Every few miles those little buggers would make themselves known...even when we got into our state!! PPPPUUUUUU!!

This musical group was very talented!!! I'm listening to their Cd's as I type=). I definitely enjoyed myself and I guess it showed. The band leader came up to me afterwards and said "It sure looked like you enjoyed the music." LOL!! The great thing is, they donate part of the proceeds to orphanages in Russia. So far, in the 10 or more years they have been in the US, over $100,000 has been raised!!! They tour all over the US. I had to crack up though. They mentioned that the night before they had played for over 100,000 people and then, I look around and they were playing for about 30 people...if that!!! Crazy! I got a kick out of all the kids. They all just automatically started dancing..like it was just in their blood and they remembered!!! =)

I said in a previous post that it seems like whenever I start to question this whole process, I somehow get a sign from the Man Upstairs to keep pushing along and to be patient. Well, the director/owner just happened to be there. What luck of mine! I asked to speak with her and she was very happy to. We started talking. I think I've mentioned before that I look really young. I usually get about 17...and I'm almost 25....Well, on goes our conversation and the director went on to say she thought I was one of their grown up adoptees!!!! OMG!!!! I had to laugh but at the same time, I have to admit, I was a little embarrassed!!! LOL!!! We all got a good laugh!! But anyway..through our conversation, she reassured me that my situation is fine and that it wouldn't be a problem...I'm young, healthy, etc. Even though it was late, she offered to give ud a tour of the offices/building, explained more things/the process, and answered any questions I had. I felt very comfortable and at ease. I appreciated that!

Now, onto more waiting and hopefully that agreement is signed SOON!!!

Thank You For The Music

For as long as I can remember, music has always been a big part of my life. Actually, when I stop and think about it, music has to do with many of the memories I have! I come from a musical family and music is embedded in many of our traditions. I have blurry memories of my mom, sister, and I making cookies at Christmas. We'd listen to "The Nutcracker Suite" by Tchaikovsky ( f.y.i a Russian composer) and thinking "I can't reach the table" and having to kneel. I was pretty young. Every holiday (Christmas, Birthday's, Family Sunday's, etc) with out fail, someone would whip out a guitar or play a piano and we'd all sing together. I remember thinking, my Grandpa was an absolute genius. We'd drive up North or someplace and he knew the name of every song on his radio station, the year it came out, and would then tell me a story or a memory he had of it.

This helped shape my love and appreciation for all types of music. Growing up I did theatre, choir, etc., and now have the opportunity to sing and play the drums with bands, record with local artists, and am blessed to cantor (lead the congregation in song) at my church. Everyone has their crutch and music has always been mine. I love how music can be everything from a joy to an extreme comfort and say the things we often can't. I'm so thankful God has given me the special gift of song and music. It is especially comforting now, when I hear a song that gives me hope and peace during this trial period. I hope one day I am able to share the love of music with my child. The song "Thank You for The Music" from Mamma Mia, says it all for me.

Thank You For The Music
I'm nothing special, in fact I'm a bit of a bore
When I tell a joke, you've probably heard it before
But I have a talent, a wonderful thing
cause everyone listens when I start to sing
I'm so grateful and proud
All I want is to sing it out loud

So I say
Thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing
Thanks for all the joy they're bringing
Who can live without it, I ask in all honesty
What would life be?
Without a song or a dance what are we?
So I say thank you for the music
For giving it to me

Mother says I was a dancer before I could walk
She says I began to sing long before I could talk
But I often wonder, how did it all start?
Who found out that nothing could capture a heart
Like a melody can?
Well, whoever it was, I'm a fan

So I say
Thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing
Thanks for all the joy they're bringing
Who can live without it, I ask in all honesty
What would life be?
Without a song or a dance what are we?
So I say thank you for the music
For giving it to me

I've been so lucky, I am the girl with golden hair
I wanna sing it out to everybody
What a joy, what a life, what a chance!

Thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing
Thanks for all the joy they're bringing
Who can live without it, I ask in all honesty
What would life be?
Without a song or a dance what are we?
So I say thank you for the music
For giving it to me
So I say thank you for the music
For giving it to me

What's Meant to Be, Will Be

I always seem to start with "I haven't posted in a while...," and here I go again...

The summer is coming to an end and for some reason, I feel it's the end of one chapter and the beginning of a new one...in more ways than one. For starters, my sister got engaged in the beginning of August. I'm very happy and excited for her! She is over the moon! I can't believe my big sister is getting married!!! =) She has been with her fiance (strange to say that now,lol) for over 3 1/2 years!! They just seem meant for each other. They have set the date to next July. Our family is headed for some awesome changes! Especially for my mom...she'll be giving one daughter away and (hopefully) gaining a grandson (again, hopefully) not very long after. I'm super excited for this new chapter in our family story!

There hasn't been any new news about the adoption agreement. I'm am soooo anxious for it to be published! So many things are up in the air and I feel left with so many doubts. Yet, I still have very high hopes that this is what I'm meant to do. I start to have doubts but then God gives me signs of the path I need to take. They couldn't be any clearer and then my hopes are restored. God placed adoption in my heart a very long time ago for a reason and it is now just beyond my reach. I believe he is trying to teach me patience and testing my true faith.

Music is very important in my life and always has been. Anyone who knows me know this. I feel very blessed to be able to share my talent with others. Isn't it funny how many emotions music can evoke? The songs "Keeping Me Guessing" by Francesca Battistelli and "I Have A Dream" from Mamma Mia explain so well this situation!! I don't know how my story ends, but since God is in control, when the time is right for me, I'll cross that darn stream!

Keeping Me Guessing
Coffee cup waking me up
I gotta board a plane
And fly away
sometimes it feels like I’m
going at the speed of light

Can’t relax I’m movin to fast
I wanna find the gold
But I don’t have a map
I wish that I could know
What you’ve got in store for me

I try and try to read your mind
But I forget that patience is a virtue
Your teachin me to hold on tight

And I don’t know how the story ends
But I'll be alright cause you own it
I don’t know where the highway bends
But I’m doing just fine
Cause your in control
Even when I don’t know
Where my life’s gonna go
You’re keeping my guessing

Slow me down, show me around
I wanna see the world that I’ve been without
I am here and now the future is out of my hands
I trust in you and how you move
I won’t forget that patience is a virtue
You’re teaching me to hang on tight

Cause I don’t know how the story ends
But I’ll be alright cause you own it
And I don’t know where the highway bends
But I’m doin just fine
Cause your in control
Even when I don’t know
Where my life’s gonna go
You’re keeping me guessing

Seasons come and seasons go
But you decide

And I don’t know how the story ends
But ill be alright cause you own it
I don’t know where the highway bends
But I’m doing just fine
(repeat x2)

You’re in control
Even when I don’t know
Where my life’s gonna go
You’re keeping me guessing

You’re keeping me guessing


I Have A Dream
I have a dream
A song to sing
To help me cope
With anything
If you see the wonder
Of a fairy tale
You can take the future
Even if you fail
I believe in angels
Something good in everything I see
I believe in angels
When I know the time is right for me
I'll cross the stream
I have a dream

I have a dream
A fantasy
To help me through
Reality
And my destination
Makes it worth the while
Pushing through the darkness
Still another mile
I believe in angels
Something good in everything I see
I believe in angels
When I know the time is right for me
I'll cross the stream
I have a dream
I'll cross the stream

I have a dream
I'll cross the stream
I have a dream

This and That

It's been a little while since I've posted! Things have been very busy for me. I would have loved to take a class this summer but I just couldn't find any to fit in with my schedule. =( So, I'm taking advantage of the extra time not spent studying and added a couple new jobs to specifically put towards my adoption. It's not a lot, but any little bit helps. =) I've also started the book "Toddler Adoption: The Weaver's Craft." Thanks Masha for the recommendation!

ADOPTION NEWS:
According to the State Department, Secretary of State Clinton, has appointed Ambassador Susan Jacobs as Special Adviser to the Office of Children’s Issues (the office responsible for inter country adoption and international parental child abduction). This is a great step forward and I'm very anxious to read the final version of the new "Agreement." It's awesome that the U.S. and Russia are working out this agreement so the many thousands of orphaned Russian children can find loving parents and belong to a family, whether it is in Russia or the U.S.

I'm really lucky that I am able to bring my doggie "H" with me to some of these jobs. It helps..I don't have to feel guilty leaving her while working extra. =) She just loves kids and I think it's GREAT preparation for her. She has been coming with me ever since she was a little bitty pup and all I have to say is "Do you want to see the kids?" and she perks her ears up, runs to the front door, whines a little and then sits =). We go outside and she heads straight to my car. We get in and she gets right in her spot and I put on her special doggie seat belt. "H" is completely spoiled and has been my baby for the past 20 months. She is a total love bug and super sweet. I just hope she doesn't feel displaced when a new little person joins our family. I've heard when someone has a new baby, bring a "scented" baby blanket home from the hospital so the dog can get used to it. That would be a challenge from Russia!!! What has everyone else done?

St. Nicholas

I'm always on the look out for anything Russian or pertaining to Russian culture. I would love to learn all that I can so I can keep my future child's heritage alive.

I learned something new a while back. My Godson/little cousin was making his first holy communion. So, I went to a religious store to get some of those patron Saint card things for in his card. I was in the M's and decided to mosey down to St. Nicholas. I've always liked the name Nicholas (but spelled...Nikolas) for a son and decided to see what it said. I was pleasantly surprised to find out..."The Russian Church honors St. Nicholas more than any other Saint. He is the patron of Russia." How cool!

I do plan to either keep his given Russian name or make it a middle name, along with adding my Grandfather's name as a middle or second middle name. My Grandpa was extremely important to me and to the rest of my family. We were pals and I think he would be honored I would choose to pass his name down. I believe that it's important his Russian heritage be honored and kept, but also, just as important for him to be given a cherished family name. My future son may potentially have one long (but important) name!!! =)

Now, I just need to hurry and age a little bit(I can stop after I hit the magic #25) so I can get the ball rolling!!! Or, should I say the humongous paper chase? Ever think you'd hear a woman want to hurry up and get older?!?!

Adoption Treaty

I found this article in the Moscow Times, dated June 18. I am glad that the US and Russian governments are able to work together to form an agreement.



A new Russian-U.S. child adoption agreement is ready to be forwarded to authorities for approval after negotiators reached a speedy deal under which Washington accepted most demands put forth by Moscow.

Adoption from Russia will now be done through authorized agencies only, and the adoptive parents will have to undergo special training, children's ombudsman Pavel Astakhov told Vremya Novostei in an interview published Thursday.

U.S. parents will also report on the health and living conditions of the children, and social workers will be allowed to visit their homes to verify the reports, Astakhov said.

Both countries are expected to approve the treaty within six months, a senior official at the Education and Science Ministry, Alina Levistskaya, told RIA-Novosti this week.

The agreement will have retroactive effect, which would allow Russian authorities to press charges against the U.S. mother and grandmother who sent their adopted child, Artyom Savelyev, 8, to Moscow unaccompanied on a plane with a note that said he was violent and psychologically unfit.

The incident prompted Russia to effectively suspend adoptions.

Savelyev was adopted through an independent agency — a model that Russian officials have said does not allow them to monitor the living conditions and well-being of children.

Under the agreement, Russia accepted a U.S. proposal to introduce obligatory U.S. accreditation for adoption agencies, which will have to comply with the Hague Adoption Convention, ratified by the United States but not by Russia, Astakhov has said.

About 3,500 Russian children are currently in the process of being adopted by 3,000 U.S. families.

U.S. families have adopted more than 14,000 children from Russia over the past five years, including 1,500 last year.

About 120,000 Russian children are registered as orphans every year.

Talks

I haven't posted in forever! When things get busy for me, it sure gets hectic around here.

This post is way over due but extremely necessary. Everyone familiar with the Russian adoption world already knows this, but I thought I should put this up before the final round takes place in June. Here is what the U.S state department said:

May 14, 2010
A U.S. interagency team met with their Russian counterparts in Moscow May 12 – 14 to discuss an adoption agreement. This most recent round of negotiations ended Friday, May 14, after three days of positive and productive talks. Both sides are committed to the common goal of increasing safeguards for adoption between Russia and the United States. “We listened to each other’s concerns and made significant progress toward an agreement that will improve the safeguards in the inter-country adoption process,” said the head of the U.S. delegation. The meeting participants shared their views on how to improve existing processes to better protect the children and families involved in inter-country adoption. The discussions were detailed and concerned specific issues, including the domestic laws and international obligations of both countries.

The negotiating teams are working on language of a draft agreement and plan to meet again in the coming weeks. The next meeting will likely be in Washington in June.

It is our understanding that there has been no change in the status of on-going inter-country adoptions originating from Russia. Many thousands of Russian children, who were not adopted by Russian families, have found loving, safe and permanent homes in the United States through inter-country adoption. We are pleased to be discussing with the Russian government a future approach to ensure inter-country adoptions continue.

I am cautiously optimistic that things will work out. Many prayers to the Man Upstairs, especially for families currently in the process.